Second marriage, first family holiday

We have organised two Au Pairs to look after our five kids. Not mine, but ours, and one extra. Sounds and feels over-indulgent and I slept this morning until 11.30am. Holiday at the coast might as well be just Second Hubby and I, hiding out in our air-conditioned room, stepping out to put a meal together for the gathering. Just perfect.

Would I recommend hooking up again, getting married, combining families? In my world, if you have the money and sense that this other person is your friend: analyse, hesitate and then go for it. Second Hubby’s absolute certainty concluded me. My tight friend. I have given him 10 years and agreed to the traditional wedding, so our four kids could experience and feel safe in the commitment they see; so everyone, us included, can breathe a sigh of relief.

He sees more of the rough undersea terrain than the other boys did, can handle what he sees and even compliments some of the steep shadowed slopes and is attentive in exploring the submerged crevices which bend around in the dark waters.And says ‘what my love? I am listening’ more often than most. He has watched me fly, cruising at high altitude, he has watched me deep dive to the mountains beneath. He has seen me act selfishly – as I admit my irritation with his eldest child. His response? He gives me space and takes his kids out for the afternoon, rather than chastise my unsuitable reaction to an 11-year old kid. Second Hubby has not yet seen me fully check out, but perhaps because he has so far caught me at the cusp and has been explicit about not letting me bail.

We have far to go, but perhaps not so far, and who knows what is the next step: except for me and him and Him, for now.